Just Chilling

Tonight I am just taking it easy and relaxing.

I worked in the SMC chapel in the office today which left me feeling pretty satisfied. I am glad with what I got done. For a few months I had been thinking that the layout didn't really work and seemed to have problems. People seemed to get bottle necked and stuck by the door and you could never get to the things you needed to when you needed to.

So, with Carol's help and ideas, I moved a few desks and shelves and chairs. I really like it now. It's not completely done, and never will be, but tomorrow I am planning to go in and sort through some more papers as well as figure out what all we need for supplies and stuff. I need to figure out where I am going to put all the fabric that I use for decorating the communion table, but I have time. For now, I just want to get some more things sorted and put away.

It's nice being able to go in and just kind of have a familiar and comfortable space to myself. I go in, get a computer up and going and start playing my youtube favorites playlist. I have a few songs that I listen to everyday. I have discovered that I love songs with a good piano, drum and or guitar beat or pattern in the background. Absolutely love. I think it appeals to the simple, calmer, more natural part of me.

Well, I think I am going to go find something fattening and unhealthy to eat and keep watching Stepbrothers. So much for my original plan to go for a bike ride or walk. I want to go take pictures since Alma is so pretty in the summer. Maybe tomorrow, but probably not since I have to work in the afternoon.

Wednesday after work Jessica and I are going to the fair. I am pretty excited!

Well, I think that is it for now. I am trying to update this more often and even start posting pictures. So whether people find this and follow it or I just keep venting and baring my soul to the internet, it should be good.

Sometimes I get so frustrated

I have a lot of mixed feelings right now. Most of them stem from my job. I thought I would really like it, but not all the time. The job itself doesn’t really bother me, other than when IT and conferences don’t get a long, but I think we got past that. The biggest problem for me is my coworkers.

I have become aware of just how different I am from them. Ed and Karen and Kellee always have something negative. I hear them complain about how horrible the college is , how it is so cheap, the dorms are horrible, and how the food is so nasty and how school is so expensive, an Alma degree doesn’t mean anything, etc. And the profanity is very unnerving to me. I don’t swear so having coworkers, especially Ed, who thinks nothing of dropping the f bomb all the time bothers me. Today I told him while we were waiting for lunch that I had had enough of the language and he said he would say whatever he wanted. 

To me swearing is crude and undignified. It shows a lack of creativity, vocabulary and intelligence. It cheapens whatever point you are trying to get across and for me pretty much makes you lose whatever argument you were trying to convince me of. I also hate how Ed thinks he is right and knows so much about everything. He is like a more vulgar and crude 21 year old version of my uncle Daniel and I hate it. I can’t seem to say anything without him having to prove me wrong. I don’t want to just be meek and submissive, but I try to avoid anything that will lead to controversy. Conversations at meals are never things that I would want to talk about or have with friends or even ones that I bring up. Things like sex, how Christianity is wrong in so many ways, how horrible Alma is, why drugs should be legalized, alcohol, etc.

I like that I don’t have to cook, but the company at meals is to the point where I am almost ready to throw in the towel. Part of me wants to know if I am being unreasonable and should just give in, but no. I refuse to change my morals and my character to fit in with those around me even when I am the minority.

I guess my biggest problem is how whiny and complaining they are. They just seem so pessimistic all the time. They never have anything positive to say and can be mean and have no problems being mean to anyone they come in contact with. This is so different then how I am. I believe that if you are nice to people and honest with them, they will be nice to you.